The subject gives to the other what he or she does not have. This object is the traumatic objet petit a, the object cause of desire. Behind the narcissistic relation- ship toward the love object we encounter the Real, the traumatic object in ourselves, as well as in the other: “Analysis proves that love is in its essence narcissistic, and reveals the substance of the presumably—fallaciously—objectal as that which is in the desire its residue, i.e., its cause: the support of its dissatisfaction, even its impossibility.” I-can-t-love-you-unless-I-give-you-up Renata Salecl

Jujutsu With Zizek